Well after more than a year since I last saw my vocal instructor...I had my first voice lesson on the 27th of this month. My pastor was with me and he, not even really knowing much about the voice classically, commended me about how well i did considering I hadn't been to see her in so long.

After reviewing the recorded lesson...here's a few things I noticed from listening:

it seems that from years of mocking dramatic singers (i.e. Denyce Graves, Dame Gwyneth Jones etc) i've succeeded in causing vowel distortion to my vowels...especially the 'ah' vowel which always seems to sink back into the throat keeping me with an unnatural wolfy, psuedo dark sound. I imagine my true vocal tone has shades or flecks of darkness in it; but the tone is more honeyed, more light...sopranoish with dark inflections...but it should be thrilling and free. I'm going to have to practice more on the italianate 'ah' vowel....making certain that the sound is ALWAYS forward...hitting the back of the teeth more as Dr. Lines says.

I must break myself from judging my progress and sound based on listening to myself. I can't help but remember Dr. David Jones' article about the acoustical deception of singing involving the internal listening of how you sound.

I have to also learn that above or right at a F# I will have to start thinking light...lifted and head voice much as soprano's think. Perhaps one of the reasons i've not been able to hit a G or even the Ab above C5 is because i've tried to carry too much heft, too much meat up the scale. On the flip side...much time and patience will have to be given over to ironing out the problems with the lower part of my range. I want to be able to dip into chest with no problems and sculpt it to the degree that it can carry. I want my entire range to gain an eveness from top to bottom.

I'll have to throw out all of what I learned previously...especially since Dr. Lines told me that the very first time I met her and learn to shut up and be teachable! Im under a new instructor and I don't know anything! LOL I want to sing and I want to sing with a gloriously beautiful instrument. I have the raw natural tools and they must be tempered and cultivated and she's the one to do it. I'm going to settle down and embrace my own sound and not some other operatic performers'. I'm going to love my sound and see the finished product.

After listening to the voice lesson; its amazing that my voice is still intact after the years of not working the vocalises and building and the lack of performance as well as the neglect and negligent usage of the vocal instrument. From today on I will treasure and take care of my instrument because I only have one and if I loose this one, I cannot get another one. #stewardship101

Working on Mahler will be much more difficult than I thought...because now I have to learn to sing it artistically as the composer wants it...but first I have to fine-tune some things with the basic instrument.

More sleep at a reasonable time...
More water...and physical exercise...
breathing exercises...

After that...this time around I can't waste any more time...gotta get this like a hustler...gotta get ant-mode on this. Even with writing and acting...singing has always been my first passion and biggest dream. Right now I don't know where all of this is going to go and i'm comfortable with it...I do have a goal and my goal is to get my voice together for a recital that Dr. Lines will perform with me and a possible musical to be apart of. I've got to get #AntStatus according to Proverbs 6 and work work work on this! Excited and thankful to the Father for permitting me to still have something to work with!

'after much consideration; i'm embracing my sound and not ordering my sound after someone else's. i'm not just a vocalist or a voice....i am a walking, living , breathing, talking instrument. a living wind instrument.' #Singer'sCreed #SongCycles